Ode to Resident Evil

I love Resident Evil.

And I, like many other fans of the game/movie series, don't really give a crap what movie critics think of Afterlife.

I've been a fan since the very first game with Jill and Chris on PS1. I couldn't even tell you how many times I played through that game. I got to the point where I could beat it in less than 5 hours. I played most of the games after that, with the exception of just a couple.

I also like the movies.

Are they cheesy? Yes, it's all cheesy, darling. It has been from the very beginning. The people who like Resident Evil aren't fans because we think it's high art.

We want to see zombie heads burst at the end of a shotgun, and we want to see some shit get blown up. We want to be startled by scary zombie-like animal creatures popping out of nowhere. We want to see the annoying people bite it and the fittest bad asses survive.

Oh yes. If you need me Saturday night, I will be in the movie theater wearing those dorky 3D glasses, stuffing my face full of calories, and relishing in the kitschy gore-filled genius that is Resident Evil. I'll let you all know how it goes.

* * * *

And here is an illustration for your viewing pleasure. That's right, I'm cramming it all on one post today. I am thinking of starting an alternate blog for the art stuff, just so y'all have somewhere else to chase me around on the internet. LOL


It's an elk skull. Prints are available in the gallery. Click the pic to give 'er a lookie if you're interested.
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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

indie review - Everafter Acres, by Carolyn Kephart

Set in medieval times, the short story Everafter Acres is about a discontented princess. Her knight/husband has rescued her umteen thousand times (rescues symbolize sex in this particular story, I think), and she's bored with that whole dynamic.

Likewise, she's tired of the castle neighborhood (which is essentially a subdivision), and her social obligations seem tedious. She leaves home to seek help from the local wise woman.

The story was well written and edited, with the exception of a slight overuse of the word 'vernacular'. The author does an excellent job of keeping the speech and details consistent with the time period.

The only major issue I had with this story was that there was a lack of resolution. There was action; there was conflict. Resolution? Not so much. The conclusion was more of a temporary alleviation of the boredom than an actual conclusion.

If you would like to read the story yourself, it can be found at the link below. The story was free when I downloaded it, but now costs $1.

http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/24132

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

interview day!

I have an interview on the Simply Wonderful Books blog! The link is below. This is the last stop on the blog tour. Better late than never, I always say.

http://simplywonderfulbooks.blogspot.com/2010/09/interview-with-author-lea-ryan.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+ASimplyWonderfulLife+%28A+Simply+Wonderful+Life%29

Date Night

Date Night is a movie that stars Steve Carrell and Tina Fey as a married couple: Phil and Claire Foster. They are a little over domesticated and a lot bored. They have relationship issues that many people probably encounter at some point, like not enough time to devote to their relationship. The characters are easy to relate to for most of middle America.

As a change of pace, they decide to go to a fancy restaurant and take someone else's reservation to get a table. Due to a case of mistaken identity, the Fosters find themselves mixed up in a blackmail scheme. People try to kill them. Phil and Claire have to solve the mystery before they get their butts shot off.

The movie was really funny. How could it not be with Steve Carrell and Tina Fey in the leads? There was also a lot of action with car chase scenes and running.

Stars are all over this movie, including: William Fitchner (Drowning Mona) as creepy district attorney, Kristen Wiig (SNL), James Franco, Mila Kunis, and most importantly - deliciously shirtless Mark Wahlberg.

I usually like a little more grit in my movies, but this one was alright. I give it an A with some extra credit for a half-naked Mark Wahlberg.

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

random monday updates

This weekend was pretty cool. Let's review.

I got to hang out with my babies, my husband and my cat, all of whom I love so very much. The dog and the other cat are alright too.

I helped with deck building activities and used a drill. I was going to use the circular saw too but when I pushed the button, it wouldn't go. I then developed a fear of what other unpredictable behavior the saw was capable of. Therefore, I did not saw.

Novella writing status as of friday - 7000+ words of probably around 15000. Still planned as ebook freebie and not free (but cheap) print edition.

Writing count for the weekend - zero words. That is a very good thing because that means that my brain had some time to recover from the writing workaholic schedule I put upon it. Brain is ready to go for the week.

Music awesomeness. I set up the ps3 to play my pandora radio stations through the surround sound. That's right. I am a genius!

Also scored two new-to-me electronica CDs, one by the crystal method and the other by daft punk.

Set up the digital gallery. For some insane reason, my life feels incomplete without a gallery. I guess I just draw things, and then I feel compelled to do something with them. I didn't add any photographs this time.

There isn't much there yet, but here is the link.

http://www.zazzle.com/avinaleo

Most of it is older stuff, but new illustrations and so forth are also in the works. I have this really cool elk skull graphic that I can't wait to slap up on there.

I think that's all I have for this short round of updates.

This week - date night (movie), urban hermit (book), september indie review (more book) and maybe an illustration (not book).

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

attention kindle nation

MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth is now available on Amazon Kindle! And it's only $1.50!

gun on the mantle

Ok, so there is this thing in writing called the gun on the mantle concept, aka Chekhov’s Gun.

The idea is that if you mention something in a story and the mention is significant (described in detail), then that object or whatever should be integral to the story at some later point.

It makes sense, right?

Well, to what extent can you mention/describe an object that you don't have to include it as a major part of the plot?

I see the settings in my stories pretty clearly in my mind, and there are sometimes objects of interest in those rooms that I feel add character to the story or the people in it. Of course I want to leave them there.

But what if those objects don't come up again in the story? Can't they just be there for the sake of being there and noticed because they're interesting?

Can the characters have a brief conversation about, say, a painting and move on with life? That's how real life works most of the time. We take notice; we move on. Unless that object impacts us emotionally or some other truly significant way, we probably don't think twice about it. That doesn't mean it never existed.

What's the limit on the gun on the mantle thing? A sentence? A paragraph? A page?

I'm putting too much thought into this.

End writing tweak-out.

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Ptitlexn9xzsjd5fif?from=Main.ChekhovsGun

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

goth girl paper dolls

This is the second post for today. The first one was more substantial, so I probably should have posted this one further down. Ah well. scroll down if you want more stuff to read after this.

Anyway, I call this illustration 'goth girl paper dolls'. I'm trying to get some stuff together to reopen my online gallery. I don't know how long that might take. Well, I guess technically it never closed. I just sort of abandoned it to concentrate on writing. I think I've reached a point in which I can balance the two activities pretty well now.

I really like the way this looks blown up. This is as big as the thing goes here.

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

Book in a Month

I recently read Book in a Month, by Victoria Lynn Schmidt, Phd.

Here is the pitch (quoted from Amazon) – “Using a combination of flexible weekly schedules, focused instruction, and detailed worksheets, author Victoria Schmidt leads you through a proven 30-day novel-writing system without the intimidation factor.”

Book in a Month teaches a system of outlining that is far more indepth than your basic taking-notes-in-history-class outline. If you follow the program, you develop a story thoroughly- characters, setting, plot. The book asks good questions that cause you to think of your story and the people in it in great detail, even the props used in a particular scene.

The author includes motivation throughout, which is nice if you need that sort of thing. She emphasizes goal setting and checking your progress toward those goals as well.

Honestly, I don't think I could write a decent book in a month. But I do think the outlining process and the writing concepts are sound.

One thing I didn't agree with was Schmidt's suggestion that you shouldn't go back and fix problems or make changes until the initial draft is finished. I think she suggests doing so in the interest of making good on her claim that you can finish a draft in 30 days.

In practice, I don't believe that's a good idea. Wrangling 70,000+ words is difficult enough without adding new complications. Fixing issues sooner rather than later is advisable.

The only certifiable bollocks I found in the book was the bit about buying a new copy of the book each time you begin a new project. Um, how bout no.

How bout I make my notes in the spiral notebook I bought at walmart for 15 cents during back to school supply time and not write in the nice book.

Despite that crackpot (old timey word alert) suggestion, Book in a Month is really useful. If I were ever to teach a class on creative writing, I would use it as a textbook.

It would also be a good tool for anyone who intends to participate in NaNoWriMo (http://www.nanowrimo.org/). Although if you are really trying to crank out word counts, outlining might cut in on writing time. You could do the outlining in advance and launch into the writing when November hits.


_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

How to write the crappiest protagonist ever

Yes, this was inspired by someone. No, I will not say who.

How to Write the Crappiest Protagonist Ever

bY: Lea Ryan

For the sake of simplicity, our protagonist shall be henceforth know as Bob.

Absolutely do NOT give Bob any special qualities or characteristics. He should be everyday everything.

Give Bob no emotional range. Bob can be angry. Bob can be depressed or happy go lucky but never, oh never, let him out of that little emotion cage. You cram him in there, lock the door and toss away that key.

Don't let Bob say anything interesting. Even better, give him an irritating verbal tic. He should talk in circles beginning and ending with a tic. Tic. Tic.

Also, Bob must not be permitted to evolve in any way. As a writer, it is your responsibility to banish silly notions about personal growth. People don't grow. They don't change! Let the story be the current that sweeps Bob along. All he can do is flail (or not) because Bob is helpless.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

Barnes and Noble ebooks

Barnes and Noble pulls their ebook titles from Smashwords, which is an ebook website that I currently publish on and love.

I publish on Amazon Kindle too.

Both are fine, but Smashwords has certain freedoms that Amazon does not.

For instance, anyone can post free content on Smashwords. Amazon Kindle does not let just anyone post a freebie. They reserve that right/privledge for special publishers. Oh yes, they do. Why?

My theory is that their focus is propping up the publishing man, or more likely, publishers pay them to host the free content to boost the sales rank of their titles. In Amazon's defense, I'm sure they make more money from those big publishing houses than they do from me, so I won't hate on them.

Since Barnes and Noble pulls content from Smashwords, that means the content is still free once it hits their website.

This is the first free short story I posted on Smashwords. It was accepted into the premium catalog and then posted to Barnes and Noble's website.

Boo yah. Freebie on the website of a national chain bookstore.

That's all I have for now. Have an enjoyable weekend. Next week - announcement September indie review title, the release of the illustrated version of MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth, and a link to another interview of moi. Also, a possible author website makeover.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

pesky definitions

I used a word incorrectly in MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth. Naughty.

It's not a huge deal. I refer to a veranda a few times in the book. I used it to describe a patio-like structure attached to the house with a low wall around it.

Merriam Webster defines a veranda as having a roof. What I referred to as a veranda in the book was a similar structure, just without a roof.

Oops!

Will I change change it? No. It's a fictional story, not Architectural freakin' Digest. Besides, wikipedia defines it as 'generally' having a roof, so someone aside from me, at some point, has referred to a similar structure as a veranda. If there is some sort of precedent, I'm cool with it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veranda

Pounce, word nerds, pounce!

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

guestifulness

You won't find me here today, dear hearts. I'm over there somewhere, taking up space on someone else's patch of cyberspace.

The fates and a title explainified. guest post on the Miscellaneous Moments blog!

http://moorewrites.blogspot.com/2010/09/fates-by-lea-ryan.html

Link to the interview plus Kalifornia

Wait! Before you read this, read that - http://writinginsight.blogspot.com/2010/09/blooming-author-lea-ryan.html

It’s an interview! WOO!

Ok, I've been holding off on reviewing this movie for a few days due to book working and such. But here we are for some business as usual.

The movie Kalifornia came out in the year 1993 I'm not really sure how we missed this one when it was first released because given the look and the stars, it was/is right up our alley.

Brad Pitt, Juliette Lewis, David Duchovny, and Michelle Forbes (Ensign Ro from Star Trek). David Duchovny looks SO YOUNG. The rest of them pretty much look the same as they do now.

The plot is thus. Early Grayce (Brad Pitt) is a crazy redneck who goes on a killing spree. Adele (Juliette Lewis) is his adoring (and possibly slightly retarded) girlfriend. David Duchovny plays Brian - a writer who is researching serial killers for a novel. Michelle Forbes is his avant garde photographer girlfriend - Carrie. The four of them embark on a journey to California by car. They travel together for financial reasons.

The movie is very well done, sort of artsy but not over the top or annoying. There is a huge difference between the Early and Adele characters. She is sunshine with a dash of sadness. He's crazy on trashy, but he loves her in his own messed up way.

The other couple seems more compatible. They're both uppity types, definitely not as interesting as Early and Adele.

I don't really buy Brad Pitt as a killer. His acting is fine but he's just too darn cute to play repulsive or scary. I'm not saying he did a bad job. He was fine. It's just that, I think people expect their movie killers to look a certain way and that way is not like Brad Pitt. No matter how you try to dirty him up, he's still too pretty to pull off certain types of roles.

Nonetheless, the movie was good. It gets an A-.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

intro from the novel

I don't have much to say today. I thought I would post a bit on the novel. I promise I haven't shifted the focus of the blog to only stuff about MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth. That would be an exercise in self centeredness, wouldn't it? It's release week! What do you want from me?

Here is the intro, located after the table of contents and before the prologue, in case you were just dying to know.

"I knew it was over when they let us burn the bodies. Never in a million years would the sisters have allowed us to dispose of them otherwise. I did thank God I didn’t have to go down into that cellar anymore and see them. Standing over the Reau House dead as they burned smelled far worse, but the fact that I would never again have to see their lipless grins or inhale the dust from their funerary suits made up for that one last stench."

Off that subject, I'm on tumblr now. I'm still trying to figure it all out. It feels like a strange new alien world. I've never seen a website like it.

Here is my link - http://more-squid.tumblr.com/

Yes, I'm everywhere. That's how I roll. Are you wondering why the URL is more-squid? Well I based the name on something I read about setting up an online presence. Whoever wrote it (sorry, can't remember) offered up some advice that went roughly - think less earthworm and more squid. as in more appendages, be more places. Get it?

I posted some things on there today. Hopefully I'll be wittier and more adept at a later date.

I also started writing a novella the other day. I haven't written one of those yet, so that should be interesting. I've written short stories and novels, but not a novella. I hope to have it out before the start of next year. The release date will depend largely on editing. I was thinking about releasing it free on smashwords and then a print copy on amazon.

What is tomorrow? Wednesday! Wednesday is interview day. Here we go. Hopefully I won't sound like a halfwit. The link is below. We should all visit.

http://writinginsight.blogspot.com

That's all I have for now.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

ohh la la, party time!

The novel is OUT! MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth is on sale at Amazon and Smashwords.

Here be the amazon link.



Buy it, yo. That shiz is off the heezy fo sheezy.

But you want freebies, you say? Then freebies you shall have, my pretties. Free short stories, coupon codes, and other fun things are up on ye olde website - www.LeaRyan.com

Also, I'm holding a drawing for a free signed copy of the book. The entry form is on the website too, assuming I set it up correctly.

What is on the agenda for this week? The interview with Sue of http://writinginsight.blogspot.com is scheduled for Wednesday, 9/15. Never fear, I will remind here on the blog and on the Twitter as well.

I think I'm writing a guest post for Miscellaneous Moments. That might be Friday.

That's all for now. Thank you to all of the totally awesome people who support what I do.

random friday updates

Reading- The Urban Hermit by Samuel Macdonald
Soundtrack of the day - Year of the Gentleman, Ne-Yo

So much to do, so little time in which to do it.

Today is Friday, so I have slightly more time than usual.

This evening's projects include this very blog, some website updates for the release next week, finishing up interview question responses. Also, I'm still trying to figure out what to write for my guest blog post on Miscellaneous Moments. I feel obligated to make it something more interesting than the usual rambling and relevant to the book release. Suggestions are welcome!

I can't wait to get back to writing fiction. I really miss it. If ever I make a substantial level of income, I'm hiring a marketing person to handle that stuff for me. Marketing is okay, even fun sometimes, but it removes a rather sizeable chunk of time that I might otherwise use to write books and such.

I am very happy not to be drawing right now. I like how the illustrations turned out, but my attention span for that part of the project was quite limited. I was so excited to be finished with the drawings that I half-assed the cover for the short story that I'm releasing on Smashwords next week. I think I devoted a huge 20 minutes to it. LOL, ah well. Free is free, right?

The story is entitled Mischief in Reau Garden. It features three characters from MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth, only as children rather than the oldsters they are in the novel. That should be up for download (up for download?) by Monday.

MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth should be ready for download then too, but not for free. Awww, I know. There will be a limited time coupon code for 50% off the ebook though, which will make the price $1.50.

The special illustrated edition release will be slightly delayed. It may be available toward the end of next week. I will anounce here on the blog when it's ready to go. I am deeply sorry, dear ones.

Off the subject of books, I finally finished watching the first season of Dr. Who last weekend and began watching season 2. I am now in the David Tennant years. Woo! He's not quite as manly as the first guy, but he's still alright.

That’s all I have for now. Have a lovely weekend.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

pondering the creepiness of severed doll heads

Last night, I was bopping around online (as I have a tendency to do) and came across a couple of pictures of severed doll heads. I thought, damn those are scary. And then I started to ask myself why a severed doll head is often perceived as a creepy object. It's just a hunk of plastic, after all. Why does it become disturbing just because it was disjoined from the other parts of the doll?

I came up with some plausible theories.



1. Resemblence to an mutilated self? Do we see ourselves in that severed doll head?

2. Symbolic of lost innocence? Dolls associated with childhood associated with an infinitely less complicated way of life before stress, before romantic relationships and such.

3. Loss of security? Another childhood thing. Some children take comfort in toys. That's why firemen supposedly give out teddy bears, right?



4. Or maybe it looks a little too much like a deceased child? We probably should be disturbed by the image of a young member of our species who suffered such a grave trauma, even if it wasn't real. If we have survived this long, we must be hard wired to regard this image as unsettling.



hmmm...perhaps I spend too much time thinking about strange things.

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

A Perfect Getaway

A Perfect Getaway stars Milla Jovovich (of Resident Evil hotness), Steve Zahn, Timothy Olyphant, and some other chick named Kieli Sanchez. It’s about a couple on their honeymoon in Hawaii. They travel to a secluded island to do some hiking and hear about murders on another island. The killers are, of course, still at large.

Husband and I both thought the movie got off to a very slow start. A long time passed between the beginning and when the action actually commenced. There was some tension after the main couple met up with another couple, but for the most part, the first half hour to forty five minutes or so was somewhat dull.

Once the action took off, the movie improved significantly. There were a few genuinely gruesome parts, which is always a plus. I think when the blood is lightly sprinkled throughout a story, those parts have more impact, don’t you think? With movies like Hostel, you sort of get to the point where the injuries lose their impact. It’s like – oh good, a needle through the eye, ooh not another severed limb, whatever will we do.

A Perfect Getaway was alright. If you can catch it on HBO or whatever, it’s worth watching. I wouldn’t make a trip to the video store for it though. It gets a B-.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

yet more book argh

OK, remember how I previously wrote about doing a color version of the book? No? Yes? Well, I did. I took a poll about which version of the book to come out, hard cover with black and white illustrations or paperback with color illustrations. The hard cover with color illustrations costs too much, like $50+.

Well, I went to set up the paperback with color printing yesterday, and the price was almost as high as the color illustration hard cover. effing ridiculous. I used the book calculator before in an effort to make an estimate of what it might cost. Apparently I did it incorrectly because the actual cost was WAY higher than what the calculator told me before.

It just sucks because I only need color on about ten pages but they charge for color throughout. I'm going to have to do all black and white, which makes me quite unhappy. I really love color.

The color versions of the illustrations will be up in slide show form on my website during release week, so y'all will still get to see what they look like. I am considering putting up printable files too, in case anyone wants to print them for personal use. My daughter has requested two of them to hang up in her room, so I guess it's conceivable that someone else in the world might want to print one of them out too.

On the to do list for this week before release week - finish answering interview questions, decide on guest blog post subject matter, also write the guest blog post, set up paperback with black and white illustrations, write event announcement for goodreads, do a few website updates, etc. The list goes on.

I'd better get to it.
_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

wanna hear it, here it go

I finally finished the illustrations for the special edition of MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth. Thank God. I love to draw, but when doing so begins to feel like a chore, I want OUT! There are seven illustrations in all, I think, if you count the fancy scene separators. They aren’t evenly distributed throughout the book. Most of them are toward the beginning.

Even if you don’t plan to get the illustrated version (on lulu), you can still check out the illustrations. I am planning to set up a slideshow on my website during release week.

What else? Oh yes, I realized this weekend that I accidentally named a character in the short story Amy (free on smashwords) the same name as a character in MacDowell Sisters & AnnaBeth, which was really very unintentional. The name is ‘Kevin’.

I stuck the name in the short story as a placeholder because I hadn’t decided on a name. I just used ‘Kevin’ because it was the first name that popped in my head. I planned to change it later, but didn’t. So now when the book comes out, it will probably look like I have some weird obsession with the name ‘Kevin’. I don’t, by the way.

I did manage to take a day completely away from book activities! That is crazy. This is usually a seven day a week operation for me, and no, I’m not exaggerating. Husband and I went with a couple of friends to a band party in the country. The party was totally awesome! There was food and drinking and music and people dancing.

It brought back memories of hanging out at a friend’s farm when I was a teenager. It also made me remember why partying in the country is the best. Every one else is so far away. You can be as loud and obnoxious as you want! Very nice!

So ends my wonderfully long weekend.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

what I learned in book publishing kindergarten

I'm one of those hands on learners. I have to try and fall on my face a few times (usually more) before I get something right. I'm not claiming to have everything right now, but I'm doing some book publishing activities correctly. Let us go through a brief list of what I've learned and maybe I can save someone else a few times of falling on their face.

Book formatting in Word - I use the 2003 version.

Use the 'mirror margins' setting and a gutter, which is like an extra margin for the inside.

Set page number alignment to ‘outside’ or page numbers will end up on the right.

Don't put text too close to the page numbers because that looks weird.

Do not use tabs for indents. If you tab over for an indent, smashwords will reject your file. You have to move that top little triangle on the ruler. Also, you only need to take the indent in 2 notches or so.

Chapters should start on right hand pages. (Courtesy of lady editor)

Non-book formatting learnings

Coming up with the title is much more difficult if you wait until the book is finished.

Weird plus complicated don't mix well for the general reading public. This conclusion isn't based on a survey or anything. It's just a theory of mine, really. I can be weird or I can be complicated, but I probably shouldn’t be both.

Free is the best advertisement. This is a new one for me, so I don't have much in the way of free out yet. Think about the first time you read your favorite authors. Did you buy a book first? Or did you check it from from a library or borrow the book from someone else? People like free stuff, and if they like your freebies well enough, they just might buy a book some day. This is also free marketing for the person trying to sell books, as there are many websites on which an author can post free downloads of their work.

What else? Ah, yes. READ DIRECTIONS and FORMS. I have a tendency to be a scatterbrain. When I switched from lulu over to createspace, apparently I didn't read the part of the forms that would have 1. Listed my book for sale on amazon and 2. Added keywords to make the book come up on searches. DUH! Big brain! I delayed my own book availability/searchability. Is searchability a word? I’m thinking no.

I need to read my book a minimum of five times (plus have one other editor) in order to catch most of the things that are wrong. Having a cooling off period is very important too.

Have an editor, any editor. Even if you think you are supreme word king or queen, someone aside from the author needs to read that book. They will catch things the author won't guaran-effin-teed. Even if the reader doesn't have the proper training to pick out many grammar mistakes, they will give a reader's perspective - a what the heck does that mean? Or a this can't possibly happen/exist. Minimum qualifications for editor should be - reasonably good grasp of the language and acceptable reading comprehension.

And finally - if the goal is to have the book for sale on amazon, then use createspace instead of lulu. They are cheaper and faster. Seriously.

_________________________
Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

my very own fail. on my very own blog.

Below is a tag off some pants I bought from Old Navy (or as my son calls it - Old Maybe). I apologize for the utter crappiness of the blackberry photos you are about to view.



Look! What a DEAL! Pants for $14.47! Buy them. Take them home. Let's see how much they were marked down.






Aaaaawwwww. Maybe next time. As you may be able to see in this blurry ass picture, the price underneath the clearance tag is exactly the same as the regular price on the regular tag.

Glorious! Beautiful! Really? Like you couldn't take off $1 or even a few cents?


I'm onto your games, Old Maybe. Fool me once...

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1

watching Dr. Who

I like sci fi.

My husband does not.

Therefore, I do not get to watch sci fi shows very often. This fact makes me very sad. It’s not that I’m forbidden from watching that stuff. My husband just has a tendency to make fun of it.

I used to try to watch Star Trek Next Gen reruns with him. He made fun of them, said they were cheesy. They are cheesy sometimes, but they are also awesome. I grew up on that shiz.

When I tried to watch various shows on the sci fi channel, he would walk into the room and immediately ask, “What the hell are you watching?”

[sad face, channel click]

I knew what was coming – more mockery of an awesome genre.

I recently started watching reruns of Dr. Who. I managed to catch it a few times on Sci Fi (aka SyFy, bleck) when the husband wasn’t around. I liked the episodes I saw, but then I just kind of forgot about it.

I finally got tired of seeing all of these references to Dr. Who on the internet, etc. It seemed like everyone was having all this fun watching it but me. I started to feel left out.

I set out on this mission to watch Dr. Who, all of it from 2005 to present. AND, it turns out that Netflix has the seasons available for streaming.

I watched an episode with the husband. I think he may actually like it! He said he liked it anyway, which means that I may actually get to catch up some time this century.

He did say it was cheesy. Of course it is. But at least he’s willing to watch it, hopefully without making too much fun. Rejoice!

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Other places to find me:
http://www.LeaRyan.com/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/LeaRyan1