Friday, April 16, 2010

in which my friend set herself on fire.

Have you ever seen something that triggered a crazy memory? That totally happened to me today. I was reading a blog and saw a cartoon illustration of someone on fire and this thing that happened in high school just popped into my head.

I had a friend, I'll call her Jeanie, which is not her real name. She was a year ahead of me, so I think I was a junior. Jeanie was kind of wild. One day, she pulled me into the restroom to show me something.

She tells me about this party trick she saw someone do in which they sprayed their forearm with hairspray and lit it on fire. She proceeded to assure me that it 'wouldn't hurt'. Then Jeanie demonstrated, using her lighter and a can of hairspray.

It did not go well.

Jeanie's arm lit up like a, like a, like an arm on FIRE! With hairspray! I remember being surprised at how big the flame was. I’m pretty sure I wasn’t much help. I probably just stood there gawking.

I think she was surpised too because she started flapping. Jeanie beat her arm on her leg to put out the flame. I don't remember exactly what happened after that. I do remember she ran her arm under water. She ended up with second degree burns, I think. And she informed me that it did indeed 'hurt'.

Needless to say, when the adults, principal, nurse, parents found out, there were follow-up questions. They accused her of freebasing and she was subjected to many inquiries by authority figures and I think some counseling. Really all she was doing was being a dumbass kid.

So remember children, if you want to avoid various questions about what drugs you do and your mental state, do not set yourself on fire.

That is the moral of the Jeanie story.

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Twitter: @LeaRyan1

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